Hey friends! You know what? I am living in the land of overwhelm right now and there is no real reason for it. Everything just feels like too much. I look at the calendar and sigh. I think about cleaning my house and decide to do the bare minimum. I have so many unread blogs and substack. I am deleting emails without reading them. For whatever reason I just do not have the brain space to deal with anything except the stuff that is keeping us alive. It’s not even mid year! What is happening!!!
Did you see on Instagram that I flew to New Zealand last weekend? My sister got married (she only decided two weeks beforehand) and it was gorgeous! Even though I was running on fumes and it was a whirlwind 2 days I am so overjoyed that I got to be there. I won’t post a photo because she hasn’t shared any online so I don’t want to overstep but here is a photo of her friend’s property where they held the very small and casual ceremony.
I try not to share too much about the serious stuff that goes on within my family but a few weeks ago I had to ask my eldest son to move out. I wanted to share this because as parents we (or maybe it’s just me) constantly feel like we are fucking up or fucking our kids up. I know I am a fairly decent parent, not perfect but man do I try to do my best. So when my son treated me like crap one too many times I knew I had reached my limit. And that’s OK. I want you to know what I keep telling myself- it’s OK to have boundaries with our kids. It’s OK to not like their behaviour and choices. It’s OK to say “I love you but i can’t have you live here any more”. Parenting is hard.
Next week I am booked in for a haircut. The “I can’t stand myself” phase continues and now I want new hair. My hair is not long, chin length at best, but I think I want to go shorter. Or have a different style. We’ll see how I feel when I am sitting in the chair. Hair grows back so it’s no biggie if I had shitty hair for a few months.
My quest for a new style continues. I’ve ordered a few things online from stores I’ve never bought from before. Fingers crossed I find some good items. I also think I want to buy these sneakers to wear on weekends but they are a little pricey for right now.
Can you tell I am bored with life right now?!
A few things I have consumed lately-
Tim and I devoured the latest season of Drive to Survive (on Netflix)
I really enjoyed these two books while travelling on the weekend.
I made this recipe last night and I think with added spice it could be great (I also added spinach)
That’s all friends. I hope you are doing OK. I am doing OK.
talk soon xx
The Back Fence 
oh I hear you re the overwhelm. Life just seems like a lot lately, everywhere you turn. I think your attitude to your son and the situation is a really great start to managing the overwhelm in general. Boundaries seem like key to me, easier said than done.
how exciting for your sister and so so wonderful you were able to be there.
can’t wait to see your new hair do and your new style. Sometimes we just need to shake everything up and see what lands.
cheers Kate
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hair appointment is tomorrow & I feel like chickening out! But I am at the point where I am only wearing my hair pulled back so that tells me I need a change.
And why do you think things seem too much right now? I look at my life & it’s still the same but I feel like there is just too much input into my brain.
As for my son, it’s not an ideal situation but it is what it is.
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I think you are right about too many inputs, I feel I know too much about what is happening all over the world, in strangers lives, in my kids lives plus cost of living, declining quality of life for our kids and the future, it just feels like the fun has gone out of life. It’s all about the hustle and the scramble just to stay afloat. I know close to me and my small circle there are still great people and many small joys, but the inputs drag me away from those and they just feel like a lot.
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I say this Tim all the time- we know too much about people, stuff we should never know! Says the lady who has a blog & shares all her thoughts…..
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Just reading “I think I want to go shorter” has sparked an urge to chop all my hair off. I’ve been in a long phase for a couple of years now, I think I’m getting overdue for a drastic change. Parenting *is* hard, and I’m sure you’re doing an excellent job – boundaries are healthy for everyone, but not easy.
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It always feels so good to have a big cut but I’m feeling nervous about tomorrow….we’ll see what happens
And yes, parenting is hard at any age & so are boundaries.
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